Sadness... -sniff-

[Winter]

I'm sorry to annoy you guys with my real-life conflicts but I'm sort of depressed and really sad about it and I don't really know what to do.

As you saw in the c-box, I sort of lost my best friend, leading to my ultimate sorrow. Not ultimate per say, but I'm pretty sad about it cause we used to be really close and now, it's as if she's a different person. The story is relatively simple and, what the heck, really stereotypical. I'll start from the beginning so it makes more sense.

You see, my friend is very silly and hormonal. Specially hormonal. She's been like that since I met her. She's always found it necessary to have a boyfriend, but after most boys rejected her (not paid attention to her would be more accurate but she thinks she has been rejected), she became very depressed. And desperate. Specially desperate.

My friend began smoking recently because she liked a guy who liked smoking but claims she did it because she enjoyed it. But it's just obvious she does it to feel closer to the guy. The guy keeps rejecting her and she allegedly forgot about him, but she keeps smoking. I'm not particularly enthusiastic about her smoking, and neither are the rest of our friends. She knows about the dangers of smoking and what happens when you smoke, but that's not important to her. Plus, the 'popular' kids in school smoke nonstop, and her secret desire is to be part of them.

Well anyway, I disapprove of her smoking and I usually harass her about it. I'm not very harsh about it because she'll become to sensible but I don't keep it a secret, which was perhaps my mistake. We've been quarreling very often because of it and now our friendship is like a rollercoaster. During one of our 'downs' I told this guy-friend I have about it and he sort of told the entire year about it. She got really upset and blamed me, and though I apologized, she's been distant from me ever since. She began hanging out with this girl we used to hate because she approves of her smoking and they actually smoke together sometimes. She also became this phoney, sad excuse of a person and we don't talk anymore. She pretends to be my friend and she pretends to like everyone but she hangs around with this girl and makes 'subtle' comments insulting me. She also makes fun of my heritage. Once she was saying very loudly 'Of course Colombia is a country! Yes, I thought it was a village as well, but it's a country. Colombia is a country!' then she'd giggle in her false way and people around her would think it's a joke and laugh with her. It's repulsive. She pretends to be someone she's not after she began hanging out with this girl and I'm the only one who knows she's faking it.

I don't wanna loose her friendship but that seems like the only option. What do you guys reckon I should do?

[b√αиk]

I got a quote for you.

Never look back unless you are planning to go that way.
No man is rich enough to buy back his past.
- Oscar Wilde

Don't look back and want it to be the same. Somtimes you have to let go of friends. Sometimes though they let go of you first. I have lost many friends in my lifetime. Due to fighting, moving, or even dumb silly things.

Winter you can't ask us for help in your life. It's your life. We shouldn't have any influence over your life. You can't use our opinions to rule your life. You have to look inside of you and see whats right and whats wrong. If we gave our opinions it would be like helping you cross the street.

If we helped you cross the street dragging you behind and not saying anything what would happen in the future. You wouldn't know what to do if you were alone. You have to look left and right in your heart and decipher what to do.

Please don't feel offended by anything I have said. This is your life and you must learn how to decide whats right on your own. =]

love always,
~ blankyz

[George]

here are some uplifting quotes to make you feel better *pats on head*

“Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin!"


"To be good is noble, but to show others how to be good is nobler and no trouble."


"Love is always bestowed as a gift - freely, willingly and without expectation.
We don't love to be loved; we love to love."

heres where i got them: www.mccoyescapes.com/uplifting_quotes/

Click For Nice Thoughts

Don't Fret, things will always turn right in the end.

[Moony™]

Awww Winter! It's just terrible to lose a friend... But at these times, when we're all growing up, sometimes friendship can break apart. We can say that your friend changed, but I believe there's still your friend in her.

I think what affects her the most is how other people view her--friendships can come that way, but it's not the most truest friendship like you guys had. Soon, I think she may want to come back to you--give her the best memories as possible and be there when she comes back.
Even though it's a sad time, you should show her the best love a friend can give. Try to understand her as much as possible but still remind her of what you think for her own good. I know that she values your friendship, somewhere in her heart. So you guys are in an 'iffy' friendship, but it's not over yet!
Be the best friend you can be, but keep up being sincere.

It may look like she has lots of friends and she's enjoying it there, but those times will fly by soon. Smoking? Seriously, she'll regret it.
And Winter, I trust you that you're a sane person, but just in case--stay strong Winter! No to smoking! Stand on your ground! You're a heroine! Rescue your friend; what she's going for is clearly a bad choice--she'll really thank you in the future.

And even if you thought that you've decided to let her go, it's okay... lots of people change and some of the changes and decisions aren't for the best. But, I want her to think of you as the best, truest friend she'd had. Because some friendships return; there must be something about you and something about her that brought you guys together.

And to your friend: Boyfriends aren't necessary right now. You'll find your true love someday! A guy way better than that guy. It's okay if you get rejected--fate is saving you from a bad relationship! Be your self too, don't try too hard to fit in... stand strong in your morals and what makes you unique.
Look, sometimes I wish to live in Holland just because Winter's there. She's the awesomest, kindest, intelligent person a person can have for a friend. You're really lucky, you know?
Don't make regretful decisions, okay?

[rainbow-FiSHY]

Oh, Winter~!

*huggles*

I hope you'll feel better!
I know how you feel...But let's keep the negatives out, shall we? ;D

It's time for a dose of Fishy's Uplifting Treatment For the Sad and Depressed!

ONE. soup for your soul.

First, let's have you read some quotes and sayings!
Keep them in mind to help you along ;)


life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...it's about getting out there and dancing in the rain.
(c)Whateverlife.com

This means that you should remember not to be a spectator, but one of the people in the play! Don't hide from yourself, your feelings and others. It's up to you to decide on what to do. You may disapprove your BF's behavior, but what should you do about it? Use your mind and use your gut. ^^ Don't shrink away from her when she insults you - it'll motivate her to do that more.


don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened!

I know I'm trying to avoid negative thoughts, but I had to bring this up. >_< Sometimes friends just...drift apart. Well, not always drift. Some slowly seperate and before they know it, they don't know each other anymore. For others there was a thunderstorm, and lightning happened to be there to settle it. There are many ways, but sometimes this just isn't avoidable. Don't give up, though! Try your best! But all the while, don't look back. Looking back at happy moments, sadly, sometimes just let you down more. Instead, look at it in general. Was she a great friend? Yes. Be glad for that.

TWO. pills for your friend.


take a step outside of yourself and turn around; take a look at who you are
(c)Whateverlife.com

This one is for your best friend. ^^ This is kind of like the 'put yourself in another's shoes' one except for it's you still in your shoes, but just looking at yourself like you're observing a picture or watching a movie. Take the risk to get close to her and ask her to just look at herself. Is this the person she really wants to be? I don't think you should ask her this directly though...


To be a star you must shine your own light, follow your path and not be afraid of the darkness, for that is when stars shine brightest.

It's great that you understand she is desperate. Alas, sometimes desperate people take big risks no matter the cost. She is hiding from herself, most likely because she's displeased with who she is and the fact that what she found necessary just never came to her. Like Moony said, fate is just saving her from a bad relationship; that's all.

THREE. optimistic-tize your mind.

Click HERE for The Gee I'm Having A Bad Day, I Wonder If There Is Anything In The FooPets Forums That Will Make Me Grin...Thread :o). FooPets is a site where you can raise a virtual pet. Anyway, don't pay too much attention to that; If you'd like to sign up, just click here; who knows? I just might get credit! xD Off topic alert! That's an URL to one of the threads in the site. I love it; I go there all the time to find funny pics and such whenever I'm having a bad day. You should read it too! It'll cheer you up - a bit at least.

FOUR. know who's with you.

Remember all your pals on WW are there for you! :D

Stay true to yourself no matter what!
Don't let your friend bring you down; instead, lift her up!

You have an important role and you know it!
I know you're depressed and sad, but have you ever thought that your friend might be too?
Lift her out of those dark shadows of the past!
It'll be hard, but you can do it!

Meanwhile, find your way out first! xD

Good luck and best wishes!